


The diary told me, you idiot

by FarCryZine



Category: DAYS (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Boys' Love, Diary/Journal, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Dominance, Enemies to Lovers, First Kiss, First Love, First Time, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, Love/Hate, M/M, Missed Connections, Pining, Psychopaths In Love, Sex, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, brief mention of Usui/mizuki, brief mention of kazama/tsukamoto, but they love each other - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-06-12
Packaged: 2018-10-23 07:06:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10714626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FarCryZine/pseuds/FarCryZine
Summary: Ooshiba Kiichi is the type to keep a diary, so that when he is famous it can be published as his biography. He spends an evening reading it and remembering the times he's had growing up with Kimishita. But what happens when Kimishita reads it?...Kimishita realizes how long ooshiba has liked/hated him, and begins to feel... stirring. What does Kiichi feel for him? And what is happening to their dynamic?





	1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

 

Kimishita Atsushi was not the kind of person to keep a diary, but Ooshiba Kiichi most certainly was. Of course, it was in the hopes that he could have it published some day after he became a famous soccer player, lived the life of the rich and famous, and had lots of cool cars and went to all the best be-seen-at events. Well, he already kind of lived the life of the rich, but his parents only let him flaunt it sparingly. Kimishita, on the other hand was constantly offended by Ooshiba’s flaunting, and never could see it as one friend buying something for another. But then again, Kimishita didn’t think they were friends. Ooshiba, however, had his handy diary to look back on to remind him of just how close they’d gotten over the many years that they’d been going to the same school, and playing on the same soccer teams, sharing the same wins, losses, and frustrations with the other team members.

 

The evening sun was setting pink behind the trees outside of Ooshiba’s window and he was at his desk, homework pushed aside, thinking over the day. He had done great today, as usual. The coach had made him a starter and he had received solid passes from Kimishita and Kurusu. Mizuki had scored more points, he sighed thinking about this; but Mizuki had steadily gotten better since touching a soccer ball only 4 years ago. Damn him, how did he do that? Ooshiba probably practiced the same amount…maybe.

 

Ooshiba pulled forward his diary. Just for fun, he thought he’d flip through some of the earlier entries. He found an early one written in large blue letters, sloppily. He began to read, a slight smile on his face.

 

_-I went to the Junior J League workshops today and had a great time! Everyone says I played great and can be a professional player one day. My dad was happy even though I told him I wanted to be a famous soccer player instead of a doctor. Oh! There was another guy there who was amazing too! We will be friends because everyone else sucked. Although he thinks he is tougher than me and tried to push me down. Fat chance! I am way taller already even though I am still growing. They gave us box lunches which were lame but there was watermelon too. I am so tired! But I can’t wait to play more soccer with that passer. He didn’t tell me his name and frowned when I asked him. That’s why we started to push each other I think. Whatever. I am so tired._

Ooshiba was intrigued now and flipped forward a few pages, seeing how even then, Kimishita and he had always been fighting. It must be natural. They’d had a good day today, but man, sometimes he just pissed him off so much. His eyes landed on an entry a little further up.

 

_It’s the second to last day of Junior J League! It has been so much fun to be here playing great and having a friend! My sister says I am in a good mood now, which is nice because she’s not slamming doors in my face like always. Kimishita and I eat lunch together under that huge tree by the bleachers and I trade him my unagi for his tamago. I hate unagi, but he doesn’t seem to care because he always eats everything. But he is still shorter than me! Ha! He can kick way further though and he can dominate in the free kick practices. I told him that but he just huffed and didn’t say anything. Then I said: hey that was a compliment you dick. And he actually flicked me off! I was trying to be nice! When I was flopped on the grass after that way-too-long run, he sat by me and gave me a towel. So I think we are still friends. I hope we will have a class together when school starts._

Ooshiba felt a little strange, sitting there at his desk. The sky out the window was now a deep purple. He sat back, tossing his red hair off his brow, and thought back. So they didn’t always fight. They were always friends. Deep down, he knew that. The twisted tornado of feelings he had every week about Kimishita had become so much a part of his daily life, he’d forgotten about the beginnings. Friend, enemy, comrade, hero, nemesis, bastard. He started to think about Kimishita and all these words that came to his head. He started scribbling them down on a new page of the diary. Asshole, stuck up, grumpy, helpful, dork, tough, loser, nerd, megame-chan, best friend, stick in the mud, teme, aoha, dick, amazing, jerk, passer, midfielder, sugoi, playmaker, sweaty, fighting, grabbing, in your face, eyes, angry eyes, smoldering eyes, mouth……..

 

He threw the pen down with a sound of exasperation and pushed himself away from the desk immediately, standing up. He paced for a minute with his hands deep in his pockets, slouching. _Don’t slouch!_ He heard Atsushi say in his head, and straightened up, still pacing. Fucker.  He didn’t want to read any more. He would do one more flip through, just a skim. It was funny. Wasn’t it? Did he really need to torture himself more with this revival of feelings? Maybe he should ask somebody about the turmoil he was in. His sister? Mizuki? No. Nobody cared. That’s probably why Kimishita didn’t have a diary. Because he was smart enough to know that writing down your feelings was a bad idea. That it only led to torture. But if Ooshiba wasn’t familiar with torture, then who was? _What are you talking about? You’re the most spoiled person ever! You have everything you want, and you’re lazy._ Was that his own thought or Kimishita’s opinion? Didn’t matter. It was all in his head. HE was in his head. Atsushi. All the time.

 

He sighed and turned back to the desk. He flipped that new offending page with defiance and looked back into the junior high section. All he wanted was to skim. His teal eyes danced off phrases as the pages flipped by.

 

- _Kimishita helped with my assignments today. He’s totally top of the class, but not in the looking cool department! He puts on glasses when we study. They are lame. They make his eyes look really big. His eyes are dark green with brown and gold starbursts in the middle._

_-I got a great pass from Kimishita today and scored the winning goal in our practice match! I did terrible on my history test though and mom was upset. I guess I’m only good at soccer. At least somewhere I can be the best! Kimishita gives me the best assists. There are a couple other cool guys on this team, but I think high school will be so much more  AAAHHHH. You know?_

_-I don’t think we can go to the same school. I don’t know if I’ll be able to make the same kind of plays and goals with a different passer. Will I? I tell him where to send it, how I like it, and he does it, though he’s always a dick about it at first. God that guy is such a dick!_

_-My parents are mad at the school thing. But I convinced them it would make me a great soccer player. My sister said a good school is better than soccer. But school sucks anyways. Math is ok when the teacher is nice. But having the right high school team is important to become famous. I am a super striker!_

_-he said what are you doing here baka? Like I was doing something wrong for choosing schools? But I think he was smiling. I couldn’t tell because his hair is longer now and was covering his face. There are some really good players on this team so far. And some idiots. Of course. Maybe I should have gone to saku high? My entry scores were not that great._

_-I asked Kimishita if he wanted to study at his house. I’ve never been to his house. He’s been to mine twice. Oneechan said he was very polite and had great study habits. They have the same pencil case. Dase! So lame. Man, if he tries to ask her out, I will lose it. But I want to see his house too. It’s so cool he can have all the soccer gear he wants. But he likes his same old cleats. Oh well, they seem to still be great--his kicking has just gotten better. Enough about him._

It was starting to sound familiar again. He knew this territory well. He flipped more and didn’t even need to look at the words flowing by to see how his thoughts had hardly progressed at all. Though he did slow down to read a few pages about how much he liked Usui, but Usui clearly didn’t favor him over anyone. And especially not over Mizuki. And especially when he let Mizuki be captain over himself. What was he thinking giving up the role of captain to that idiot? Well, Mizuki is not an idiot now. He turned into a fearless leader, and sometimes Ooshiba couldn’t hold back the hatred and jealousy he had for Mizuki. But Mizuki didn’t deserve that, couldn’t even fathom it actually. He’d just look at Ooshiba like a dog, all blank and questioning. He flipped and flipped the pages, barely noting the changes in pen color, slant of writing driven by emotion, words scratched out, whole pages ripped out. What had happened there? He stopped.

 

- _asshole fucker gonna die gonna kill him that fucking prick I told him_

_-(page ripped out)_

_-o my god god GOOODDDD what am I thinking it is totally wrong I don’t even like him but he is so damn sexy sometimes I just should not be doing this_

_-it’s over im sure he totally hates me we haven’t talked at all and there is no way I am apologizing I didn’t even do anything wrong. He’s gonna get it._

_-whew. What a day. I went to Atsushi’s shitty store to get some laces today. I stopped at the convini to grab some ices and he took it actually. He was nice today and we laughed about Tsukamoron and Kazama. He says they are dating, or at least Kazama thinks they are and Tsukamoron is just as oblivious as mizuki. I’m kinda bummed because you-know-who’s always bringing up Mizuki, but I ………..well. it was a good day. Everyone is dating. I want one too!!!!_

_-ug. I just can’t stand it. My head still hurts from that locker door. Man he was pissed. I thought it was funny anyways. Damn was he hot though. He was up in my face for that shit with tsukamoto. But he knows im right. He knows he wants to play with me only. Me! We are the best team. His hand totally crushed my windpipe today and I thought no one was there, not that i needed help. But ubakata came in. I believe I told her we were just having fun. He never could beat me in a fight, ever since we were thirteen but I like to let him get close. Fighting is just as good. Or at least, I’ll take what I can get._

_-got in trouble with oneesan today for being too loud in my room. She said it was gross and I shouldn't be so loud. But whatever, I know she’s doing it too. Joke’s on her though. She thinks I'm interested in that class 2 girl from the volleyball team, but it’s not her. Ha ha. But seriously, Atsushi is killing me. Should I just let him know? I’m jealous of Kazama coming right out with it. He makes everything look so easy._

_-I think we are going to always be friends and always be enemies. But I kind of like it like that. They say behind every great man is a great woman. I don’t know who that woman could be, but I think behind every great forward there is a great midfielder. And that is true. And even if he doesn’t like me all the time, I know he will always help me._

“God what fucking slop,” Ooshiba said aloud to the room. Suddenly he heard footsteps in the hall and there was a knock at his door.

 

“Kiichi I didn’t think you were here. It was so quiet,” his sister poked her head in. “If I’d have known I wouldn’t have sent Kimishita-kun away.”

 

“What! He was here? When?” He stood and headed for the door. She backed out of the way.

“He came by about ten minutes ago while I was watering the plants on the porch. I’m sorry.”

 

Ooshiba had already slammed on his shoes and lifted his soccer jacket from the coat hook. “Which way did he go?” He yelled running down the steps and leaping over the short gate. She pointed to the left toward the grocery store and the train station. He took off down the street, his long legs stretching out over the cooling pavement.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**  

 

Kimishita Atsushi had finished his homework as the sun was setting and still didn’t have that feeling of accomplishment. Practice was good. Everyone was in a good mood. But Kazama and his lovey dovey attitude was still annoying as shit. But you couldn’t blame him. When you had a big-eyed, big-hearted kid like Tsukamoto looking at you like a god all day…feelings happened. 

Kimishita sighed and decided to go out for a walk. He didn’t have to watch the store today, and he needed to stretch out a bit. He walked toward the park between his house and Seiseki. The trees and bushes smelled nice, the heat from the setting sun leaching off of them as everything cooled down for the evening. His academic thoughts nicely organized, checked off and compartmentalized for the night, he let his mind wander to the soccer idiots that normally interrupted his daily calm.

 

He’d given up on trying to love Mizuki with any real romantic feelings six months ago and it felt good to have that space between his decision and the present moment. He was content to look up to him and support him as the best captain and soccer player he had ever known. Kimishita could live with that. Emotions didn’t run too close to the surface for him. Unless you counted anger and irritation. In which case you could say he was practically head over heels with Ooshiba Kiichi. The thought actually made him stop in his tracks and look up. Where was he? Wait. What was he thinking about?

 

He’d passed the park a long time ago and now he seemed to be on Ooshiba’s winding street, the stucco houses all lined closely with brown fences, the doors bookended with potted plants. It was a much nicer neighborhood than his even though it was relatively close. But that’s the kind of thing that happened in Tokyo. He shook himself out of his disorganized thoughts, frowning. He moved off the main part of the sidewalk to lean against the side wall of a tiny restaurant. Did he just think about loving Kiichi? The biggest, dumbest soccer idiot of them all? No. No. See, that’s what happens when you actually have some spare time to stop and think. _Tch_. I let my mind wander for five minutes and all of a sudden I start having feelings for that guy.

 

Although he did ‘love’ everyone on his team, he should not be using that word so lightly. It was hard enough getting over Mizuki. He knew he could never compete with Usui—who would never ever give up, and actually had made some progress into the deep thicket of mystifying bamboo that surround Mizuki’s awareness. Usui seemed to understand him more than anyone, talk to him more than anyone, and actually be able to carry on a conversation with him, despite his crippling use of onomatopoeia.

 

Maybe it was because they had underclassmen now. Ooshiba and Kimishita were no longer the inseparable first years. Though he still could not get Kiichi to leave him alone, and they always seemed to be at each other’s necks.  He nodded decisively and made the choice to pay a visit to Kiichi. It was a thing people did, right? Just show up at their friend’s houses? Just to stop in and say hi and see what happens. The odds were good that they would not end up fighting, he thought. It had been a good day. He’d actually had a great time playing and laughing with Ooshiba today. And they shared a lunch like they had used to in soccer camp. He wondered if Kiichi remembered those times…

 

He walked up and saw Ooshiba’s sister watering the plants on the porch. He bowed slightly since she was a grade above him and said, “Konbanwa. Sashiburi.”

 

“Oh Kimishita-kun! Sashiburi. What are you doing here?”

 

“I finished with my homework early so I thought I’d take a walk. Is Kiichi home?” This was a little awkward, but he was brought up very polite, so making small talk was easy enough.

 

She thought it was awkward that he called her brother just ‘Kiichi’ without honorific or a shred of deference to the name. Well, they had been friends forever, or possibly they were having another of their fights now. She couldn’t make it out sometimes. They practiced together all the time, but Kiichi could do nothing but talk shit about him. Either that or he would refuse to back down, or slack off for fear of getting chided by Kimishita-kun. Kiichi-kun had always been a rollercoaster to live with, but this guy Kimishita-kun just seemed to make it worse. Although, she had seen them sitting on the couch watching a match on tv in perfect comfortable silence, elbows occasionally touching, sharing the same water glass or tea bottle. Boys were a mystery.  

 

“I don’t think he’s here right now. I haven’t seen him all day. And I’m sorry, but there is no note as to where he might be.” Ooshiba’s sister said.

 

Kimishita looked at his shoes, in thought. “Well, I’m going to the store. Maybe I’ll stop back by on my way back. Ja mata.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 3 coming soon!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

 

Why am I running around like this? Ooshiba considered slowing to a walk, but it felt good to run. Tsukamoron couldn’t outrun him his whole life. He should take more opportunities to run. He could hear Kimishita’s voice saying that in his head. That was why he liked that irritable little guy. Kimishita always wanted Ooshiba to do better, to be better. That’s the same thing that he himself wanted: to be the best! He grinned as he ran, remembering Kimishita’s smile from the practice game when he had caught that pass with his chest and hammered it home. That was awesome. Kimishita was his great passer.

 

He laughed at the thought again ‘Behind every great man is a great woman’ and imagined asking Kimishita to be his ‘woman’! Oh man, Kimishita would kick the shit out of him for that one! He chuckled as he ran, scanning the streets for a glimpse of Kimishita’s smaller, slender body, the shape of his hair, the way he walked so tough with his socks pulled all the way up.

 

They were always together. What did it matter if Kimishita fought with him, yelled at him, or was nice to him? What was the difference between a headbutt and a kiss? At least he always had the attention of those dark green eyes, always heard the annoyed _Tch_ when he screwed up, always had someone to trade insults with, to smile with, to laugh at other people with. So what if he never got to hold his hand (except for that time he was fouled and he helped him off the pitch) or touch his head (though one time he was looking ill and Ooshiba touched his forehead to see if it was hot) or kiss his pouty mouth…

 

Goddamn it just shut up Kiichi you _aho_. Just don’t fuck with it. Kimishita would never go for that sort of bullshit. He was always either studying, working at the store, or playing soccer. He always said that there was no time for a girlfriend, and if there was, he wasn’t interested in anyone anyways. Just let it be. Just be satisfied with how it is now. Surely you won’t die from feeling like this. Could people die from holding love in? He’d heard of people dying from holding their pee too long. Or from holding their breath too long. I bet people could die from not getting love from the person they loved. Argrhr! No! Just fucking deal with it Kiichi! Focus! We will win the finals! You are going to be the captain next year! Kimishita will be your vice captain! And we will all live happily ever after, being fucking famous soccer players, and maybe we can get a condo together or something! Where the hell could that asshole have gone to?

 

What was he doing even searching for Kimishita? What could he possibly say when he found him? Why was Kimishita looking for him earlier? At his house? That was weird. He slowed to a walk and thought over the day. Did they have homework or something? Was there something about the game he wanted to talk about? His heart started pounding. What if Kimishita had come over to confess? I mean, they did have a nice day today playing together well, really in sync, and laughing after practice about Nitobe’s move on Ubakata. That was cool.

 

He had made it over to Kimishita’s neighborhood. The store was closed and there were no lights on in his little apartment . Hunh. Oh well. He reached into his pocket to text Kimishita finally. It was fun running around all night, clearing his head, but he supposed it was time to turn toward home. There was nothing in his pocket. He’d left his damn phone in his room. He'd run out of there too fast. Shit. He sighed.

 

Well, the run had at least let him pace out his thoughts. As much as he hated to admit it still, Kazama was damn lucky. He was good at soccer, and Tsukamoto and him really seemed to hit it off. Kazama was also ballsy enough to let his emotions show, and to touch Tsukamoto in front of other people. Of course, Ooshiba had touched Kimishita plenty, with his fists. Ooshiba knew pretty much everything about Atsushi’s body ( _don’t say it like that, asshole! don’t get worked up!_ ) from their fights, wrestling around, kicking each other, the punches he’d given and received, oh so many collar grabs, and the team showers they had, though he was never one to fuck around in the shower room. That just didn’t hold with the way he was raised. It certainly hadn’t gotten him very far. Let’s think some more about this, Kiichi. What would work with Atsushi? How could he get that stubborn ass to realize?

 

He paced evenly through the neighborhood streets, the streetlamps on now and guiding him toward home. He passed a 7-11 and thought about going in until he realized he hadn’t grabbed his wallet either in his rush to find Kimishita. Why had he rushed out? His head was filled with the memories from his diary. He’d seen their whole history laid out and had been overcome with emotion for him, his best friend, his greatest antagonist. After a block or so, his mind came around to it, what would work on Kimishita. Kimishita always guided himself on reason and logic. He could occasionally be swayed when someone needed help. Should he try that? Please go out with me or I’ll die? Unrequited love can kill someone, I looked it up? No. No.

 

Reason. Logic. That was the way to Kimishita's heart. Ooshiba stood straighter, looked ahead, shook the clouds out of his head and resolved to try to be more reasonable with Kimishita. Yeah. That might do it. He’d be really nice too. No fighting. Though the thought of not touching him, not grabbing his collar and dragging his weaker body toward his face…really bummed him out.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is just ripping right along! go get him!


	4. Chapter 4

 

 

The bell rang and Ooshiba’s sister got up to answer it. Kimishita-kun had come back and brought three ice cream bars with him. “Kimishita-kun! I’m so sorry! This is all mixed up. After you left, Kiichi-kun ran out after you. It seems that he was here the whole time and I didn’t realize. He hasn’t returned yet,” she said as he stood in the entryway. Kimishita offered her the bag of ice cream after apologizing for intruding with a “Shitsureshimas.”

 

She took them to the freezer and said, “Why don’t you go up and wait in his room and I’ll see if I can call him.” She said over her shoulder as he went up the stairs, “When he went out looking for you, however, he ran away before I could tell him you’d probably come back.” They both smiled knowingly at his idiocy. He shook his head. She shrugged.

 

As he got into Kiichi’s room he heard a sound that made him smirk. It was the idiot’s phone vibrating on his desk. He leaned back out of the room and called down “He left his phone here!” He heard her short laugh from the kitchen and he went back in to the bedroom. The desk lamp was on and it cast a nice warm glow on the relative opulence of Ooshiba’s room. 

 

His bed was huge and western style. Should he sit on the bed? He had before, but never alone. And Ooshiba usually paced or sat in his desk chair. Suddenly he had a vision of Kiichi pulling off his shirt and shorts and sliding into the bed, of flopping his wild red hair on the pillow, sighing between the cool sheets, his back muscles stretching and loosening, wiggling around until he was comfy.

 

Kimishita shook his head. Don’t start thinking like that, he told himself. It didn’t work out with Mizuki and that just caused you too much anguish. Love is just a waste of energy. He passed the bed, trailing his hand on the cover, and went to sit at the desk. Maybe he’d check over his homework. He laughed to himself, as if. That lazy ass probably didn’t even do it. At least the homework was out and on the desk. That was promising. Maybe Kimishita was finally getting through to him. If he didn’t make it as a pro soccer player, Ooshiba was going to be in deep shit. His grades were never that great.

 

He stacked the books aside and suddenly seeing his name on a page, stopped short. What was this? He read what his eyes fell on ‘ _But seriously, Atsushi is killing me. Should I just let him know? I’m jealous of Kazama for coming right out with it. He makes everything look so easy.’_

What—the fuck—was this. Kimishita glanced back at the doorway before turning back to pore over this page. Was this Ooshiba’s fucking diary? He started to scan through the pages, quickly. His heart began to pound way too loud in his ears. He couldn’t hear anything except the blood rushing around like crazy and the phrases from this insane diary floating in his head.

 

 _‘I think I should tell him, but what would he do? What would everyone else say? Maybe it could be a secret.’_  Holy crap. Kimishita grabbed his head, scrunching his hair. This guy!

 

‘ _Kazama could confess. And there is no way I’m letting him beat me at this and at scoring! Blonde asshole!_ ’ A nervous laugh exploded from Kimishita’s mouth and he quickly brought his hand up to contain it. This was too much. Did everything have to be a challenge to Kiichi?

 

But did Ooshiba seriously love him? His hands turned the pages frantically now, his eyes wide and catching on phrases. ‘ _Think about him at night’_ No way. ‘ _I hate his fucking guts, but that just makes me hate my guts too.’_ No way. ‘ _Really kind about helping me with that test, but really rude about accepting something in return._ ’  Kiichi why. ‘ _when his tie is like that, drives me crazy. Wanna yank his neck, bite it.’_ Kimishita leaned in again and flipped further and further back in the diary, and continued to read, his knees trembling.

 

‘ _We sat on the swings and talked pretty late. I can say he really is the greatest guy and I would love to marry him some day. He is quiet most of the time, but he really cares about things being right. I am sure there were sparks. Like electricity. People say that happens--sparks--and I think I know now what that means. It’s in his eyes when I look right at them._ ’ Kimishita had his hand over his mouth still, but he looked up eagerly to check the date on that entry. It was from junior high, about a year after they met and started playing together. Something dropped in the pit of his stomach. If Kiichi felt like this about him…then what did he feel? He flipped to the front of the book and started scanning again the more recent entries.

 

 _‘We studied together today and it was real nice. Of course, I screwed it up and said something. Or maybe he did. I can’t even remember what we were fighting about. A cookie I think. ...I thought he was going to kiss me when he grabbed my collar and got all up in my face. Maybe I should have kissed him. See how he likes that! Ha!’_  That entry was from three months ago. Kimishita’s stomach was doing flip flops. He remembered that. And he _had_ almost wanted to kiss the big bastard that day too. Ironic.

 

 _‘His eyes, his legs, I bet he’s pretty cute when he’s relaxed at home. Does he sleep naked? Or does he wear jammies? Kiichi! You are too funny! I know self! …..aahhhhh just kill me what the hell am I thinking????_ ’  That was from three days ago. Three. Days. Kimishita’s hands shook as he flipped to the newest page.

 

Gripping the paper, he saw the stream of words that Kiichi had written only an hour ago: ‘ _Friend, enemy, comrade, hero, nemesis, bastard, asshole, stuck up, grumpy, helpful, dork, angry, loser, nerd, megame-chan, best friend, stick in the mud, teme, aho, admirable, dick, amazing, passer, mendokuse, midfielder, sugoi, playmaker, sweaty, fighting, grabbing, in your face, eyes, angry eyes, smoldering eyes, mouth, lips, open mouth...’_

 

Kimishita stood up suddenly from the desk, shoving the diary back. It took him a moment to realize that he held the page in his hand still. He’d ripped it out. He was panting, his arms shaking. Kiichi, Kiichi, oh god Kiichi, why, he thought.

 

He shouldn’t be here. He should get out of Kiichi’s room. His head was spinning and he couldn’t breathe.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> might take a few days to add the next chapter after this. but the ideas are brewing! let me know what you think so far!


	5. Chapter 5

 

Ooshiba was upset to learn from his sister that Kimishta had returned again, dropped off some ice cream, and then had to leave again to go cook dinner for his dad, all before he had returned from hunting him down. He had grilled his sister about Kimishita’s reasons for walking over anyway. “That’s just what people do sometimes, Kiichi-kun.” She replied sarcastically. “They go for walks; they stop at a friend’s house. I don’t think it was anything evil.” That morning at school Ooshiba had casually asked Kimishita also. “I don’t know. I was just walking around, went to get some ice cream. Don’t blow a blood vessel thinking too hard about it.” He slammed his locker and walked away, leaving Ooshiba confused.

 

 

 

“Is it reasonable to assume that Lord Nobunaga and his retainer were…um…boyfriends?” Ooshiba and Kimishita were sitting in a corner of the library a few days later, Kimishita generously helping the big forward to make a history study list. Ooshiba looked completely innocent while asking this question.

 

Kimishita quirked an eyebrow and continued writing. “I don’t think it’s reasonable to _assume_ anything.” He refrained from looking up at Ooshiba. “But, there are plenty of books and essays theorizing on that subject. Which you would know if you read more, baka.”

 

Ooshiba stewed on the inside. Don’t get mad. Don’t get mad. “Hmm,” he simply said and bent his bead back to the library book. It was day four of being nice and reasonable by Ooshiba’s count. Kimishita looked up inquisitively. Ooshiba had his head down, reading. His huge leg crossed over the other, foot wagging. Kimishita lingered over the light filtering through Ooshiba’s hair and falling on his lightly blushing cheeks, his long fingers twirling his pencil.

 

After being around him so long, Kimishita thought he should know what was going on in his head. But this seemed to be a whole new Kiichi. Where was the outburst? Why was he suddenly interested in history, in the love life—boyfriends—of the long dead Lord? Then he remembered the diary ( _lips, smoldering eyes, mouth…_ ) and he blushed immediately. He let his hair fall over his face and sunk his head down close to the paper to copy down a string of dates and historical events. Fuck. Fuck.  Was Ooshiba going to take a page from Lord Nobunaga’s book and confess to the man closest to him, demanding ultimate love and fealty?

 

Kimishita had thought obsessively about that stream of written words from the diary for the past few days. They plagued him, excited him. He took the paper out of his pocket in the bathroom. He looked at it whenever he was alone. “ _admire, best friend, dick, legs, lips, mouth, open mouth…_ ” The ripped paper had a special effect on him. He was beginning to feel brave. He could have Ooshiba—Ooshiba who was confessed to constantly by all the girls in second year and some of the first years as well. Tall, handsome, proud Ooshiba Kiichi, a superb athlete, and a rich boy, the son of two doctors. Also a complete braggart, obstinate fool, loudmouth asshole.

 

Could he really handle all that ego just to kiss him? Just to be squashed in a hug by him? To sleep with him? But with the words from that ripped page echoing in his head, he looked at Kiichi’s mouth, his lips, turned down in concentration, his eyes—his clear, blue-green eyes.  There was only one year of school left and then what? Would it ruin his whole life to have this one year of Kiichi? But you’ve had him for five years at least, he thought. He remembered the pages of the diary, flipping back all the way to before junior high. What would we gain? What would we lose?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woo! almost there.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking of following up with a sexy epilogue

 

 

 

 

 

Kimishita was eating his lunch peacefully in the little glade of bushes and trees near the bleachers on the far end of the soccer pitch. He’d been thinking about what Usui had said during practice yesterday.

 

“What did you say to Ooshiba?” Usui had asked. They were standing on the sidelines, watching drills. “He’s different now. What happened?” Usui’s brown eyes peered at Kimishita. Kimishita had lifted his shirt collar to wipe his face.

 

“Nothing. I didn’t say anything.” Kimishita’s forehead was beginning to throb.

 

“Well, what’s up with him?” Usui pressed.

 

“How should I know, _tch._ ”

 

“Well you’re his friend. I mean, you’re close to him, right?”

 

“Close?” Kimishita questioned. He’d looked into Usui’s eyes, the brown in them seemed to sparkle like a cat’s. Kimishita tried to read into them, to see the underlying meaning.

 

“Yeah, close.” Usui looked away to watch Mizuki hammering the never-ending balls into the goal, Nitobe feeding him a constant stream of them, Mizuki’s noises of exertion traveling through the air to them. “It always seemed that you were close that way.” Usui had smiled cryptically.

 

Kimishita thought back on that scene and tried to figure out if Usui was trying to tell him something. Did he know what Ooshiba felt for him? Did Usui suspect something between them? Did he already have a relationship with Mizuki and was trying to tell Kimishita that it was ok? That he understood?

 

He shook his head and returned to eating his lunch. He thought of that page in Kiichi’s diary about sharing lunches and thought maybe they should do it again sometime. Kiichi had been pretty well-behaved lately. It was…

 

“Atsushi!”

 

Kimishita froze. No one ever called him by his first name. Ever. And especially no one yelled it. In a split second he heard giant footsteps and was tackled from behind. He landed forward with Ooshiba on his back, his lunch crushed under them both.

 

Anger flared through him in an instant and he reared up pushing Ooshiba who was tangled in his bag over onto his back. Kimishita straddled him and started punching him repeatedly in the ribs. “BakaKiichi asshole you crushed! My! Lunch!”

 

Kiichi who was smiling at first, saw now how angry Kimishita was. His ribs started to hurt and suddenly he had had enough. He’d been nice for a whole week, taking all of this abuse and grumpy shit. His old self took over like a train speeding out of control. Ooshiba roared and grabbed Kimishita, who was on top of him. He gripped Kimishita’s arms down to his sides and rolled over, trapping the smaller boy under him and landing on top. Ooshiba’s hands went instantly to wrap around Kimishita’s neck.

 

“Kimishita! Punk-ass! That hurts! I was trying to be nice!” He banged Kimishita’s head into the ground, throttling his neck. A small part of his brain realized the ironic disparity in what he was saying and what he was doing. But he didn’t care anymore. His hormones and emotions had been bottled up too long and the old Ooshiba was in control.

 

Kimishita’s face was turning red. His eyes were dark and slitted. “Fucker,” he managed to eek out, his hands grabbing to remove Ooshiba’s from around his neck.

 

“I got a perfect score on my test!” Ooshiba yelled with rage. He released Kimishita’s neck and grabbed him by his jacket lapels, lifting him up and slamming him back down onto the ground to punctuate his sentence. “And I wanted! To thank! You!”  Kimishita groaned and Ooshiba stopped slamming him.

 

They were huffing heavily. Kimishita was lying on the ground with Ooshiba straddling him and leaning down, lifting Kimishita’s upper body up slightly and breathing in his face. Kimishita faced him, his breath puffing Ooshiba’s dangling hair, their color high, cheeks flushed and hands gripping tightly to each other.

 

“Well thank me then,” Kimishita said in a low taunting voice, “Kiichi.” Their faces were only inches apart.

 

Ooshiba’s thoughts went right out of his head when he heard his first name said like that. He slammed his lips into Kimishita’s, pushing him back to the ground and behind the cover of the bushes, his hands planted on either side of Kimishita’s hair.

 

It was their first kiss. Kimishita tried to move around, tried to get free from the force that was holding him down. But why? Instead he let something go inside himself and opened his mouth. This shocked Ooshiba and he let out a little groan into Kimishita’s mouth. Kimishita brought his hands up to Ooshiba’s neck and groaned back softly, his eyes closing. They clinked their teeth together as Kimishita turned his head to get a better angle. They both groaned at the sound hoping the other was okay. Kimishita thrilled at the feeling it sent through his mouth. Ooshiba took the opportunity to thrust his tongue deeper into Kimishita's mouth, his mind blown that he was actually doing this. He looked at Kimishita who had his eyes closed tightly. Finally. I finally got him. 

The kiss lasted forever, it was too short, they both lost track of time. Was it minutes? Seconds? Hours? Ooshiba felt like this glade of bushes was surrounding his own little dream world where anything could happen. They were floating on air, their bodies just barely containing the flood of emotions, the rushing of the blood, the lightness of their heads.

 

Finally, Kimishita put his hands on the big chest above him and applied a light pressure. Ooshiba opened his eyes and got up off of him. They both sat up.

 

“Asshole.” Kimishita said brushing off his jacket. “You crushed my lunch.” Then the school bell rang.

 

They both looked shocked. The time had gone... Oh well. He was amazed Kimishita hadn’t run to class at the sound of the bell. Well, it was a very important moment. “Did you know,” Ooshiba started. “That I have wanted to do that _for ever_.” He exhaled hugely then looked slyly at Kimishita, running a hand through his hair.  

 

Kimishita, face still red, nodded and stood up. He pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket and handed it over, saying, “I know. The diary told me.”

 

“What’s that?” Ooshiba said, until he took it and read it.  His mouth fell open. The color drained from his cheeks.

 

“Technically not forever,” Kimishita said quietly. The look on Ooshiba’s face was killing him. He felt horrible. He had to confess instantly. “I’m sorry. I read most of it, back to the swings part. And Junior J League.” He hurried through his explanation.

 

Kimishita had to hand it to Ooshiba. He recovered quickly. His pride and stubborn nature always rose to the top. He drew himself up to his full height, putting his hands on his hips and lifting his chin, looking down his nose. “Well,” he began in the voice he always used to challenge Kimishita and annoy him incessantly. “Then you know how I feel and that’s that! What are you gonna do about it? Huh?”

 

Kimishita smirked, made his signature tongue click _Tch!_ Then he reached down, picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder, smiled at Ooshiba, half squinting at the sun. And started running back toward the school over the soccer pitch, laughing.

 

The craziest feeling was squeezing his ribs. He couldn't help but laugh. He looked back over his shoulder and yelled to Ooshiba, “Come on Kiichi! You’re buying me ramen after school for smashing my lunch!”

 

It took Ooshiba only a second to react. He broke into the hugest grin, grabbed his bag and ran to catch up. “Yeah? I’ll even throw in an extra egg!” He caught up and they ran side by side, trading insults. “You'll need it for more strength; you couldn’t even push me off of you! Weak-ass!”

 

“Ha! Well, maybe I didn’t want to! Dumbass!” Kimishita yelled as he ran. This felt like the happiest he'd ever been.

 

“So you like my kissing! I knew it! I am the best!” Ooshiba pumped the air with his fist, but failed to see Kimishita swinging his bag at Ooshiba’s knees as they ran. “Shit!” He said as they tangled in the air. Ooshiba went down momentarily.

 

“Got you, baka!” Kimishita pulled ahead, reaching the gate. “Your kissing was ok I guess," he called over his shoulder. "But you need to practice more. You’re always such a slacker!” He made it through and slammed the gate in Ooshiba’s face. He panted on the other side, gripping the chain link. Ooshiba grabbed it too, gripping Kimishita’s fingers from the other side. “I’d be happy to practice more.” They were breathing heavy and laughing, the fence between their faces.

 

“Atsushi,” Ooshiba breathed quietly. His eyes and smile were so bright, his hair was a halo in the sun.

 

“Kiichi,” Kimishita drawled, his lopsided smile making Ooshiba shudder. “Idiot,” he humphed, and ran straight for the school doors, leaving Ooshiba to gaze at his retreating back.

 

“You’re an idiot!” Ooshiba snapped back, threw open the gate and raced after him with a huge smile.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I thought I wouldn't continue this. I thought it had a sweet end. But here I am, giving the readers "a little more"...

 

The day after Kimishita let Ooshiba buy him ramen, or rather, the day after their first kiss, nothing happened. They had a practice game right after school and everyone went home directly after that. As everyone was leaving the locker room, Ooshiba had muttered “good game” to Kimishita, whose response was to look up at him quickly, blush, and grunt, while walking out.

Ooshiba sat in his bedroom later, unfazed and energized by winning the game, opened his diary and wrote one huge word diagonally across the next page “MINE!” He had kissed Kimishita. They ran together. He said his name with that look. Ooh, that _look_. He would claim this guy.

 

The next day at morning practice they were running with all the guys around the outer fence, Ooshiba had drifted to the back of the group. He hated running around the fence.  And he was tired of looking at the back of Kimishita’s head, though something about the way his hair stuck to the back of his neck, the sweat gleaming on his trapezius muscles, made him shudder and want to get on with it. Ooshiba poured on a burst of speed and pulled up to run alongside Kimishita.

 

Kimishita glared out of the side of his eye and smirked. His breathing was still even and Ooshiba had begun to puff. “Getting tired, Kiichi?”

 

“Not even close,” Ooshiba smirked back, keeping pace. They were surrounded by their teammates. Did the other guys know? Usui probably did. Their elbows brushed. Kimishita didn’t pull away. Ooshiba grinned.

 

However, during after-school practice, it was a different story. Ooshiba had been feeling off all day without the usual retaliation from his best frenemy, and he was itching for a fight. It actually made him itchy. He mused that that was probably where the phrase came from.  His legs felt tingly as he was running down the pitch. Kimishita had just pulled away from Hayase in a scrimmage and made a goal against Inohara, in effect, one-upping Ooshiba’s previous play. Kimishita’s look of aloof triumph was like an unbearable medicine to Ooshiba’s sensitive stomach.

 

“Very clever,” Ooshiba growled. “Now get the ball back so we can get on with it, _aho_.”

 

“I scored.” Kimishita put his fists on his hips. “So _you_ go get the ball, _boke_.” Their anger crackled in the air as Ooshiba advanced toward Kimishita, his hand out, ready to grab his shirt. Kimishita couldn’t help but grin maniacally at the prospect of a good fight with his favorite idiot. Ooshiba’s eyes twinkled as he got closer, and Kimishita was reveling in that gleam, riding the wave of his recent goal.

 

“Plenty of balls over here, guys,” Hayase said, kicking one between their angry faces, shocking them away from each other. Kimishita clicked his tongue and walked away. Ooshiba wasn’t perturbed because he noticed a tiny smile in the left corner of Kimishita’s mouth.

 

But nothing happened that day, or the day after that, and Ooshiba’s diary entry was simply: “Mine?” in much smaller letters.

 

Meanwhile Kimishita was having a very strange week. He’d spent two nights this week in a very odd way. Nobody, he hoped, knew about it. But he had done some research. Anyone who’d ever bought manga at a huge place like Animate knew about the boys love manga section of the store.  He had gone one night after school to check it out. Some people seemed brazen about it, tromping in and making a beeline to their favorite authors. Some were wary, seeming to happen upon it, seeming to surprise themselves, seeming to be offended. But he’d taken a few looks, speed read through a few books picked at random and made a realization: no way it could be all sugar-coated like that.  Anything worthy of knowing would have to come from a more reliable source.

 

So Kimishita, always the best student, did what he did best—studied. He looked online and at the library. And in the end, some sites he found were very informative. Others only served to turn him on in a way he wasn’t used to, and he found some relief with himself that only made him muse even more frustratedly about Kiichi, Kiichi, Kiichi. As he had tossed and turned in his bed that night he imagined many scenarios of them fighting, kissing, laying on each other, and—now that his head was full of all this new information—how and when they would have sex.  

 

Finally, it was Friday and even Kimishita, who loved school and learning in general, was impatient for this week to end. It was almost lunchtime, however, so at least there was a short respite ahead.

 

Ooshiba stood across from the door to Kimishita’s classroom, watching as the people filed out for lunch, a few of the girls casting admiring glances up at him through their bangs and giggling. He knew he was tall and handsome and his normal response was to puff up and smile proudly, but behind the whispering girls, he spotted Kimishita. The shorter boy was still at his desk, writing something in his open notebook. He had his glasses on, and damn if the sight of that didn’t hit Ooshiba right in the heart. He noted that Kimishita looked pretty hot with his glasses on—not lame at all. When did that change?

 

Kimishita must have felt Ooshiba’s eyes on him because he looked up then. Glancing up from his notes he saw a shadow blocking the doorway of the class, noticing the huge idiot who suddenly gave a big, goofy wave at him.

 

Kimishita snorted and took his glasses off. “What are you doing here, moron? _Kairo._ ” After they’d kissed in the glade, Kimishita had noticed the release of an enormous pressure inside himself. But also, the beginning of a whole new pressure had begun there too. He’d been trying to remain absolutely unchanged and unfazed by Ooshiba’s new advances, but what could be done? Kiichi actually looked so cute with his ridiculous smile, waving at him to come to lunch. Embarassing.

 

“Come on, let’s go!” Ooshiba said boldly. “It’s lunchtime, asshole. Get yer head outta that book!” Kimishita observed the subtle drama as a couple girls in the hallway melted away, leaving the presence of Ooshiba once they heard there was no hope that he would pay them any attention.

 

Despite Ooshiba’s energy and appearance, he was jittery inside. He really, really wanted Kimishita to come home with him today. His parents were both working late shifts at the hospital. “You want to eat in the glade? Or on the roof?”

 

Kimishita’s head swam with the possibilities. The glade was more private, but it took longer to get there, and back. The roof might have a few people on it, but there was a private part behind the generators. Though sometimes the smokers were up there. But what did he want out of this anyway? What would Kiichi try to pull on him this time? The guy was so unpredictable. “The roof,” Kimishita finally grunted.

 

When they opened the roof door, Kimishita immediately saw two couples eating lunch near the west railing, talking softly. Ooshiba was already heading for the north side where the generators set up a good shield from the rest of the roof. Kimishita followed silently, hoping no one was thinking anything about them. Well, what if they were? Everyone was equally scorned in his book these days, so what did it matter?

 

Ooshiba plopped down against the back wall, glancing around, out of sight from everyone. Kimishita sat next to him and leant against the wall too. Kimishita sighed, letting some unseen pressure off his chest. Suddenly Ooshiba twisted toward him, placing his large hand on the wall next to Kimishita’s head, boxing him in.

 

“Eh? What’s with the _kabe-don_?” Kimishita growled, but stopped short when he saw Ooshiba’s face moving toward his. His first reaction was one of shock, which led him to knock Ooshiba’s arm off the wall. That led to an unfortunate chain reaction, however, as Ooshiba’s head lurched forward without that brace, his forehead knocking into Kimishita’s cheekbone.

 

“Ow!” Kimishita put his hands out and pushed Ooshiba’s chest away. “Are you trying to kiss me?” He rubbed his cheek and could feel a bruise beginning.

 

“Well, yeah.” Ooshiba went from shocked to angry to embarrassed in quick succession. “I thought…”

 

“What, that you could just jump on me with no warning?” Kimishita’s brows were drawn down in anger, but inside he knew he shouldn’t go down this path.  He knew what they both wanted and was just getting sidetracked into an argument again. He couldn’t help it. He spotted the blush on Ooshiba’s cheeks and saw the way his eyes looked defeated. Kimishita softened.

 

“Here, let me just--" he moved in toward him, brushed away some red-orange hair from Ooshiba’s blushing face, tilting his head up. He met Ooshiba’s eyes and saw shock there.  “Let me…” he continued as he inched his mouth in.

 

Kimishita remembered to lick his lips just before they pressed against Ooshiba’s. Kimishita closed his eyes. The lips he met were full and pliant. Kissing a guy was not terrible then, as he had thought it would be. The last time they’d kissed he’d had a hard time focusing on the feel of Kiichi’s lips, as his whole body was swirling and whooshing and being engulfed in flames that ran up and down his body. He pressed in further, putting more effort into the kiss and felt a tongue licking his lips. He opened them and let the tongue in just for a second. He pulled back and pressed a couple more soft kisses on Ooshiba, tasting his mouth. He still held the redhead’s jaw in his palm and felt like that meant he had most of the control in this kiss. He decided to push his hand back into his wild red hair, cupping the back of his neck. Ooshiba hummed at that.

 

Ooshiba felt the pull at the back of his neck and that was the feeling that released his inhibitions. He pressed forward, delving with his tongue into Kimishita’s mouth and his large hands went up to grip his head, pulling him closer. His breathing began to sound heavier in his ears.

 

Kimishita was startled at first. He had kissed a girl when he was in 5th grade, but it was nothing, just a short kiss on the lips, mouth closed. This kiss he had initiated just now, he had tilted Kiichi’s head, searched his mouth, held his jaw, but what he really wanted was what happened in the glade. Now it felt like Ooshiba was fighting against him. It was a familiar feeling. One pushing, one pulling, both getting riled up, then the other pushing back—fighting for dominance. Kimishita’s hands went down to Ooshiba’s jacket lapels. He felt waves of adrenaline and some other feeling wash over him. Arousal? Whatever it was it was making him flush and his stomach felt like he was on a roller coaster. It dawned on him that he didn’t really want to be in control right now. He loved this out of control feeling that Kiichi was forcing on him.

 

Ooshiba felt Kimishita’s body relax and loosen. He opened his eyes but didn’t break the kiss. Instead he saw a strange look on Kimishita’s face, and something about the look of his smile was encouraging. Ooshiba put his arms around Kimishita’s waist and pulled him over toward him. He wanted to feel his body on him, pressed up all along him. Kimishita seemed to give in to him, and the thought that he had finally conquered that asshole’s strong will filled him with electricity.

 

Kimishita wasn’t having many thoughts now. But the nearest one that he could comprehend was _Fuck it._ He gave in and let the big brute pull him onto his lap. They both moaned quietly and continued to kiss sloppily. In the back of his head, Kimishita was thinking about the other people on the roof, and how anyone could walk back here any second. But that thought was pushed further back as he felt a hardness starting in the lap he was sitting on.

 

“Oho. What’s this?” Kimishita just couldn’t stop himself from teasing. He put his head to the side of Ooshiba’s neck, letting his lips drag on his jugular as he spoke. “Did you do good on another test? Are you trying to _thank_ me again?”

 

“Shut up, dickwad. I think you may be having the same problem,” Ooshiba teased back. He moved in for another deep kiss, angling his hips up into Kimishita’s to prove his point.

 

Kimishita let that argument drop. He had never kissed like this before and the feelings were addicting. The waves of arousal and excitement were making him lightheaded and tingly all over. He felt a tugging as Ooshiba started pulling the back of his shirt up, untucking it and sliding his warm hands up his back, pressing down into his sore back muscles. Wow. This was great. The tension in his body was almost on the verge of melting away.

 

Suddenly the wind picked up and they heard some yelling and sounds of dismay from the other people on the roof. It sounded like something had blown over and people were rushing around to pick up stuff.

 

A flood of embarrassment washed over Kimishita and he stood up off of Ooshiba’s lap. His face red, his edgy nature immediately coming to the forefront again, he shot out instantly, “Hey this isn’t some diary dream scene, idiot. We’re in public! Have some decency!” He tucked in his shirt forcefully.

 

Ooshiba just sat there with his mouth hanging open as Kimishita grabbed his bag and fled. Decency? He would make him regret those words. "Oi, you started it!" he yelled after him.

 

 

 

 

Ooshiba waited after school at the gate, scanning the people leaving for the shape of Kimishita’s spiky hair and perpetual scowl. He was going to try really hard to be positive. He’d thought of a good idea: invite Kimishita back to his house and spring for a cab ride there. He took a cab probably once a week when he was feeling put out or lazy or tired. Kimishita could share it with him and maybe he’d even apologize. No. No! Fuck that. Why should _he_ apologize? Kimishita was the one who sat in his lap, kissing _him._ Why the hell did he jump up and run away? Did he not like his back touched maybe? The guy was a mystery sometimes, a cute little angry mystery. He chuckled. _Cute._

 

Kimishita saw the 6’2” asshole leaning on the gate waiting for him. He scowled. _Goddamn it._ Shame and anger and fear mixed in his stomach, making him growl to himself; the girl walking in front of him glanced back and moved aside in trepidation.  Of course Ooshiba was stubborn and clueless enough to want to know what the hell happened on the roof.

 

_Shit_ , he shuddered, I should just get it over with. We have a good thing going here…maybe. At least, we’ve never played so well together, except for in the beginning (junior J League flashbacks of goals and passes assaulted him and he almost smiled). Alright, fuck it.

“Hey,” Kimishita said, walking up. He could actually see Ooshiba flickering between anger and timid kindness.

 

“Hey,” Ooshiba replied and turned to walk with him. He took a big breath and said quickly, “I thought maybe you’d like to come to my house. And before you say no or you’re tired or something, I thought also I’d get us a cab there.”

 

“A cab?” Kimishita was gruff. “You don’t walk home?”

 

“Mostly I do. But sometimes I get a cab, you know, if it was a hard day or something.”

 

“ _Tch_. Spoiled.”

 

“Fine, asshole! I was trying to do something nice for you…”

 

In a rare display of temperance, Kimishita put his hand up on Ooshiba’s shoulder, saying tiredly, “No, I’d rather walk, so we can talk.” He blushed. “I can think and talk better when I’m walking.”

 

Ooshiba relaxed and said quietly, “Oh. Ok.”

 

 

They walked in silence for a while, Ooshiba phasing through emotions of impatience, wonder, gloom, and righteous indignation. He kept glancing down at the guy at his side, who seemed to be thinking deep thoughts.

 

“Kiichi, I’m sorry for being all weird on the roof.” Kimishita blurted out, still looking at the ground, straight ahead, anywhere but at Ooshiba. “I just got nervous all of a sudden because of the other people there. I didn’t know what would happen if they saw us…like that. I just freaked out.” Some silence passed. “I don’t know about all this. Yet.”

 

Ooshiba’s breath started coming faster, he tried to focus on getting home quickly.

 

Kimishita continued. “You’ve had so long to think about this. Years. I just…I like you, but I was freaking out.” He finally took a breath and looked up at Ooshiba as they walked. “Sorry,” he added, seeing the lack of anger there.

 

Ooshiba was smiling, “You like me, huh?”

 

“Yeah, moron. I always have.” Kimishita grinned crookedly. He saw a look of pride on Ooshiba’s face and nudged him. He leaned on his arm as they walked, hands in pockets. “Don’t get all stuck up about it.”

 

“Ha!” Ooshiba took that as a clue to do just that. “Hey! I’ll race ya!” And with that he took off immediately because Kimishita was clearly going to win this and they both knew it.

 

When they reached Ooshiba’s front door, panting, the redhead fumbling for the keys as Kimishita pushed into his back, causing them to both tumble into the entryway when the door swung open. They were a laughing pile of sweaty rowdy boys. Kimishita tried to kick his shoes off, but Ooshiba jumped on him at the same time, knocking him over and falling on top of him.

 

“Hey, I said no jumping on me, dick.”

 

“I thought that was only while people were around,” Ooshiba wrestled him snarkily to the floor. They were now shoeless, their bags next to the mail table. Kimishita had made it three feet before being tackled to the ground again with Ooshiba hovering over him; Kimishita tried to push his chest up off of himself.

 

“Well, that’s probably a good start,” the shorter boy thought out loud. They should keep this behind closed doors.

 

Ooshiba nodded, knowing of course about Kimishita’s tendencies to be super private and extremely morally correct. It was how he always was and Ooshiba realized it was what was probably making him nervous. “Come to my room, then. It’s private,” he smiled, nuzzling his way into the crook of Kimishita’s neck and snuffing his hair. “Nobody will be home until late.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one more chapter to come...the sexy one


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> finally. this is it. also, this is my first time writing a scene like this, so...

 

 

“Come to my room, then. It’s private. Nobody will be home until late.”

 

Ooshiba had said these words nuzzling his head into Kimishita’s neck..like he knew what Kimishita was thinking. Kimishita had never understood how people could make out in front of everyone at school, how they were so uninhibited and unaware. There was a certain level of politeness and respect due to situations and senpais that no one seemed to heed. Whenever he broke those rules, something in his stomach twisted. It was true, he had always liked (and hated) Kiichi, but the rules of society kept him from releasing any of those feelings except in socially acceptable ways. Granted, getting in fist fights in the locker room or wrestling near the outdoor sink during breaks was not quite acceptable, neither was slamming each other into lockers in the hallways. But they were more acceptable forms of release than grabbing his red hair and shoving his tongue down his throat, pressed up against the wall…

 

 

They had started out by sitting on the edge of Ooshiba’s bed, kissing. Kimishita had his hand on Ooshiba’s shirt, grabbing lightly, pulling him in. Ooshiba explored his mouth with his tongue, his stomach flip flopping, his body hyper aware of every movement of Kimishita’s. Ooshiba put his hands into the boy’s hair, eliciting a sigh, which made him kiss even harder, grabbing for his lips with his teeth. Kimishita fought for dominance, biting back, yanking him closer and tightening the shirt around his windpipe. Their breathing was coming faster and even though they had been kissing for who knows how long, they both knew that this was not how today was going to end. But still they continued, passing their tongues back and forth, searching for pressures and places that would get them a moan, a sigh.

 

Something about the way Kimishita repeated a kissing movement gave Ooshiba an idea that they needed to switch it up and he pushed back lightly on Kimishita. Without a fight, he reclined, and now they were laying facing each other, still kissing, smaller closed-mouth kisses, back and forth between looking at the other’s face. Ooshiba couldn’t help but smile, knowing that this was really happening. Kimishita’s hand was still on Ooshiba’s shirt, but now he began taking hold of the top button, undoing it, smirking, moving down to the next one.

 

Ooshiba smiled huge. “Oho? Don’t think I’m doing this alone. Your’s too.” Kimishita’s only response was a huff of sarcastic breath as he let his shirt be unbuttoned too.

 

Their shirtless, sockless kissing continued on the bed. But Ooshiba began to feel an edge of doubt creeping in. Kimishita’s eyes were closed, feeling all the sensations, and Ooshiba took some time to look at him unobserved. Though it was awesome, this did not match the Kimishita of his fantasies. He seemed remote. Maybe he was doing something wrong. What was missing from this? He thought for a minute letting his mind wander....Their fighting. It was the missing component. He made a decision. He shoved forward with the next kiss, ramming their bodies together and knocking Kimishita’s head into the wall on the left side of the bed. It didn't seem to hurt him that much, but enough to jar him and make him complain, his green eyes opening now in anger, “What the hell?”

 

“How is it? Do you like it?” Ooshiba blushed even more than his flushed state, realizing how cocky that sounded. What the fuck was he babbling about?

 

Kimishita thought about it and realized that there was something missing. That when people do this, all the pain and awkward feelings must be outweighed by pleasures. What pleases him about Ooshiba? His stubbornness? His devotion? The way he drives him to madness with his pride and ambition? The way they can fight together but still feel closer? “I would like it more if you were better, idiot.”

 

Ooshiba was shocked but didn’t see any hurtful behavior in his expression. Only the gleam of competition and taunting that Kimishita always had in his eyes. “What? You want more?” He grinned back, rising up on his knees and putting his hands on Kimishita’s hips, but Kimishita grabbed Ooshiba's shoulders to pull him back down.

 

“Come on, Kiichi. Getting tired already?” He grinned wickedly, grinding up onto him. 

"Not even close," he smiled back, remembering this same exchange from their running laps. 

“Then make me feel it already!” He pulled himself up and latched his teeth onto Ooshiba’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around his back to hold himself there, teeth digging in. Ooshiba groaned out loud and put his arm around Kimishita’s back to grip the back of his hair, yanking it, pulling his mouth off his painful shoulder. “That’s it, Kiichi, there you go.” Encouraged by the hair-pulling, Kimishita smashed their mouths together and managed to roll himself over to be on top. He raised himself up and sat on Ooshiba like a conqueror. He pushed his hips down. “Hold still.” He ground his crotch down onto Ooshiba’s and they both groaned in pleasure.  

 

Kimishita rolled his hips and took Oooshiba’s wrists and held them up to the pillows, pinning them. He stared at the model-tall, twinkly blue eyed specimen under him. He was shocked at how hot Kiichi looked. “If you don’t go pro, you should be an underwear model.”

 

Ooshiba chuckled. That was maybe one of the nicer things he’d ever heard from this guy.

 

“’Cause you certainly don’t have the grades to be anything else.” Kimishita finished.

 

“Screw you man!” Kimishita was tossed off, grabbed and tackled to the floor. Ooshiba was laughing now. Now it was Ooshiba’s turn to grind down on Kimishita, their pants rubbing together, members aching. They lay together, Ooshiba’s hands bracing on the floor but his weight pressing down, Kimishita thrusting up into him and taking Ooshiba’s tongue deep into his mouth, sucking his lower lip in and nibbling on it. His hands were on the back of Ooshiba’s neck, holding him there.

 

Kimishita pulled away just enough to catch his breath. He was still close enough to breathe in Kiichi’s hot puffs coming from his mouth and nose. They were staring into each other’s eyes. Kimishita was aroused to the tipping point, the smell of Kiichi’s breath, of their bodies, the heat emanating from the boy above him, the incredible pressure building in his stomach. “How far are we gonna go with this?" The question just popped out, but Kimishita need to know, or else he'd have to stop soon, before.... Before he couldn't.

 

Ooshiba continued to look into his eyes with no change in expression. “I figured we’d go all the way, if that was alright with you.” He traced his hands down Kimishita’s chest, his hard abs.

 

Kimishita felt hot heat spreading up his neck. “How do you want to do it?” he asked deadpan serious, trying to ignore the rushing sounds in his ears.  


Ooshiba looked sparkly with disbelief. “You really want to do it? It?”  


Kimishita looked to the side, questioned himself again deeply but found no real problem. Fuck it. “Well, I read some ways on how to do it, you know, not painfully, if…”  


“Ok, I’ll be it.”  


“Eh? ‘It’ what?” Kimishita snarled.  


“I mean,” Ooshiba looked down and mumbled “…I don’t want to hurt you.”  


“This bruise on my face hurt, asshole.” Kimishita glared up at Ooshiba from the floor.  


“I didn’t mean…that was an accident…I mean, you can, you know, try out what you learned…on me.”

Kimishita was shocked into silence. He knew Ooshiba loved him or whatever. But this guy was so bold. Love is bold, I guess, like they say. He thought for sure Ooshiba was going to just have his way with him. It's what he had been expecting all week. It was admirable to see him so willing. He was normally stubborn as shit.

“You always know what you’re doing,” the big forward continued, “so I’m sure it’ll be fine. I mean, whatever we do will be great.” Ooshiba had also always pictured himself as being the guy on top, the one towering over Kimishita, wrecking him. He chuckled lightly about the irony as he stood up and started taking off his pants. He sauntered over to his nightstand in just his underwear, rummaged around and threw something at Kimishita, who grabbed it out of reflex. “Here you go, professor.” He chuckled to try to alleviate the nervous churning in his stomach. 

Kimishita looked down at the bottle of lubricant he’d caught. Ooshiba’s nervous default was to laugh haughtily, seem high and mighty, and tease people. Kimishita’s, however, was to turn threatening, dismissive, and sadistic. “Professor, huh?” His voice took on a low and gravelly pitch, his eyes darkened as he lowered his head to look over at the tall, practically naked boy. “Well then.” He stood defiantly but calmly, took off the rest of his clothes and pointed at the bed. “Get over here, Kiichi, and let me teach you a lesson.”

A tidal wave of desire ripped through Ooshiba’s standing body and he shook with the intensity of it. With the red light of the sunset seeping through the window, and Kimishita with that familiar stance of command, and the looming feeling of what they were about to do, he felt suddenly weak in the knees, but his dick bobbed with a life of its own. Its movement reminded him to walk, move his legs, one after the other, to the bed.

As he approached in a daze, seemingly meek, Kimishita played his role. He didn’t want Kiichi to loom over him as he got nearer, so he said, “kneel on the bed.” His voice had the clipped edge of sternness, and he hoped it hid the tremor he felt in his throat. The interesting thing was that as Kimishita began to get into this role as taskmaster, or dominator, it began to feel less like a role. Ooshiba did as he was told, and as he got arranged on the bed, cast a glance over his shoulder at the still-standing boy. The look made Kimishita suddenly more intent on what he was doing. He wanted to do this with Kiichi, but also, now knowing that Kiichi _wanted him to do it_ , wanted to be taught, guided, controlled, made Kimishita absorb the act, and begin to feel it naturally.

He put the bottle down next to Ooshiba’s legs and felt the need to stroke all over the beautiful expanse of back and shoulders in front of him. Kimishita ran his hands all over Kiichi’s muscly back, stroked down his sides, his legs, rested his cheek on his shoulder blade as he reached down around his hard stomach. His hand went down to feel the hard dick thumping inside Ooshiba’s boxer briefs. “Mmm.” He heard the sound reverberate through Kiichi's ribcage, but wasn’t sure if it was coming from him or Kiichi.

Ooshiba turned his head, and while Kimishita was draped over his back, he grabbed his jaw and they kissed. Ooshiba felt Kimishita pressing hard against his butt. He shuddered. It was too much. It was going to be too much. Why did he agree to this? He hated when Kimishita got the upper hand. Right? No! Fuck that. This was going to be so good. They had to stop fighting sometime, right? Kimishita’s nails scratched down his abs, his hands stopping to grip his hips.

Kimishita leaned up and pressed his still-clothed cock against the crease of Ooshiba’s shorts and they both moaned. “Shit,” Kimishita growled. This week had been insane. Everything was moving so fast. It was all he could do, trying to keep up with Ooshiba. These past days it really ran him ragged, trying to avoid him, outplay him on the field, outwit him in the halls, to be in control of himself and this fucking guy in this fucked up relationship. He took both their underwear off quickly.

Kimishita’s nerves were frayed. It had always been a challenge, dealing with Ooshiba’s greed in life, always wanting more, just grabbing for it and never considering reason or consequence. Kimishita sighed. This is where it would all change. They’d had a revelation in the glade, when they kissed. But Kimishita could see himself spinning out of control so easily. And all this time he thought he’d lose it, that one day, he’d cave to his weakness. But all it took was knowing what Ooshiba wanted, all he had to do was give in a little bit (and he didn’t mind considering the feelings that washed over him when he did). But now Ooshiba was under him, waiting for him, looking at him with so many expressions washing over his beautiful face. 

Ooshiba was there every day. Asking him to come over, blushing under his red hair, glaring at him during practice, telling him to fuck off, glancing at him while they’re changing in the locker room. Pushing his goddamn buttons every day. But now the tables were turned, and he was about to push the biggest button of them all.

Ooshiba heard a quiet, evil laugh come out of Kimishita. He glanced back, saw Kimishita grinning sideways and stroking the white sides of his butt. Ooshiba snorted and muttered, “sadist.”

“We’ll see about that,” Kimishita snapped out of it and popped the top on the lubricant. He reviewed what he’d learned from the internet, and from watching gay porn sites. He spread lube on his hand and on Ooshiba’s hole, using his other hand to stroke up and down his long back, trying to ease the tension. He put in one finger slowly and Ooshiba made a sound.

He couldn't believe he was doing this. How had he let this idiot get under his skin so quickly? Or had it really been just years of buildup? Only just recently, he was walking to his house, eating ice cream. “Tell me if anything hurts, and I’ll stop,” Kimishita grunted out, pushing back emotion.

“No, it’s ok. Just weird.” Ooshiba said, looking down at the pillow. “You’ve done this before?”

“Hm? Yeah once. Three days ago,” Kimishita worked his finger in and out and around. “On myself. No more questions, Kiichi.” he added gruffly.

Ooshiba laughed a little until Kimishita added another, then he groaned. That kinda hurt. He wanted to fight it. Ooshiba couldn’t help but reach up to start stroking his own dick. It made him feel a little better. But both going at once was almost too much overload. This is right. Ooshiba knew Kimishita was tough as shit. He may be soft inside, but he would not, definitely would not weaken on him. He could go through with this. He wasn't wavering; he'd jumped right in. Ooshiba was shocked when he realized he just taken for granted the fact that Kimishita might not have been gay. Their kiss in the glade could've gone a whole other direction. He silently thanked some god and let himself go back to concentrating on the feeling of Kimishita's fingers. He made a pleased sound to let Kimishita know to get on with it.

But when the tip of Kimishita’s dick brushed at his entrance, Ooshiba suddenly felt the nervous tension return to his muscles. He felt spotlighted and oddly on display, a feeling he usually enjoyed. But he had to come to terms with his desires and their reality. Again he felt a slight pressure, but then it stopped. He looked back.

Kimishita had a hold of himself, his other hand on Ooshiba’s hip, looking at him and waiting for some sort of signal. Ooshiba worried what this tension was doing to Kimishita. Where was the quick decisive midfielder that he grew up with?

“Lie on your back,” Kimishita said, forcing the words out. Ooshiba switched around quickly. Kimishita knelt over him, repositioning himself again, about to push in. He looked back up at Kiichi, who couldn’t stand the way he was looking at him: it cranked up the pressure in his torso, the agony in his heart, the shaking in his limbs.

Ooshiba nodded brusquely, “Do it.” And then sucked in his breath as Kimishita did. Ooshiba felt a pain like he'd never felt before, but goddamn it, he was going to see this through.

Kimishita pushed in slow, and let out a quiet groan when his balls hit skin. They were still for a moment, breathing. Kimishita wrapped his arms around Ooshiba’s thighs, pulling him another inch closer across the bed and pressing in deep.

“Fuuuuck,” Ooshiba was coming apart already. He felt the stretch around Kimishita’s member burning, and was painfully uncomfortable, but soon he fell into the rhythm of Kimishita’s hips smacking his pelvis. It was a soothing, melting feeling, driving him slowly out of his mind. He hummed as the pain turned to pleasure.

Kimishita leaned his head back and lost himself in the sensation of being totally absorbed. The clench around his dick was unreal. It was agonizingly tight. His whole chest and neck were flushed with heat and tinglyness. His thighs were on automatic, muscles flexing, pumping in and out. The thigh muscles he’d used earlier in the week doing dashes burned, flashes of him playing soccer with Kiichi passed through his head. He remembered to look down to watch Kiichi’s face. His hair was a red bloom of petals on the bedspread, it was sunflares around the sun, it was an explosion, it was red blood oozing from a wound. Kimishita felt himself hallucinating, teetering on the edge of consciousness. He yanked Ooshiba’s legs up and toward his chest, sneering at the pleasure/pain mixture, smacking hard into the taller boy. Not so tall now that he was under him.

Ooshiba reached up with his long arms to pull Kimishita’s head toward his. “Atsushi,” he whispered before kissing him.

Kimishita growled, letting his head be forced down. But when he got closer, he bit Ooshiba’s neck, slamming into him. Ooshiba knew something was coming to a crescendo when everything started going numb, so he grabbed his own member, stroking it, only to have Kimishita’s hand join him instantly.

Kimishita smacked Ooshiba’s hand away. “Me.” He said, he pulled back a bit, thrusting slowly in and out and matching his hand stroking Ooshiba up and down. Ooshiba was pushed over the edge, panting and whining, and trying to pull Kimishita back down for more kissing. More of everything.

This was Kimishita’s new addiction, watching these expressions of Kiichi’s, kissing him, stroking him, biting him. This greedy bastard would get everything, but he would get his too. He felt a throbbing in Ooshiba’s dick and there were spurts of come streaking out of it and up onto his chest. Ooshiba’s eyes rolled back and Kimishita let himself go in one last burst of fury, of pent up rage, surprise, wonder, anxiety, fear. It all oozed out of him as he banged into Kiichi, the final straw being Kiichi clenching tight as hell around him.

Everything went fuzzy and black and Kimishita flopped down on the bed. The sounds of their panting and heartbeats was the loud song lulling him into a daze.

He came to as Ooshiba was returning to the bed, scooping him against his chest, grabbing him into a spooning position. And he didn’t even care. They lay there comfortably, breathing returning to normal.

“I want to be ‘it’ next time,” Kimishita mumbled lazily.

“I knew it.” Ooshiba pulled him closer. “I knew I should’ve taken you down.”

“Oi, I’m not saying you’ll be in charge or anything, _teme_. I just…have an idea.”

“Ha! You always did have a secret dark side.”

“Eh? You started it.” Kimishita said, and knew that was partly true. Now that this other side of him was out in the open, and ok, that Kiichi liked it and wasn’t afraid, it grew—bigger and bolder. He could confidently add another facet to their fucking weird relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so happy to conclude this on a good note. the Kimishita x Ooshiba canon is a beautiful thing. All comments are welcome and I hope to read much more from the other Days family writers in the future!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my favorite OTP at the moment. I can't stop thinking about these guys! Just had to give them their time in the sun, and to add to this small but glorious canon. Please let me know what you think! I admire everyone who has already given life to their favorite couple.


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